One Year Since The End of It
by Rachael Z. Ikins
She cleaned the shelf next to
the bathroom sink today.
Found his dusty shaving brush,
mug with a round of never-used soap
behind the vitamin oil.
She ruffled the old-fashioned boar-bristle
brush through her fingertips. Grudgingly,
she sniffed the scent of soap (remembered his neck.)
One Saturday, 20 years ago he had stopped
at her apartment between emergency room calls.
By the hand, she’d led him to the bathroom.
Opened the medicine cabinet so he could see
the brand new mug, cream and razor she bought to surprise him.
To reassure him, “There is a place for you here.”
“Last time I used that type of shaving stuff,
I was a prisoner in a German POW
camp.” He muttered, one elbow resting in the other hand,
fingers over his mouth. “They had straight razors and strops.”
She thought she had made a terrible mistake. But later,
they sat side-by side on her shabby pea-green couch. He wept..
“I did not know you were serious about loving me”
he said, “until I saw the shaving gear.”
So he said…
* * * * *
As afternoon sunlight.
descends toward dark, she spreads thick
newspapers on the counter.
She lays out one rusty blade..
Another beside it. .
Soap to scrub memory clean of the walk on the canal
when her twins slipped silently red from between her legs.
He rode ahead on his bicycle.
She wraps each piece as carefully as an infant.
From a kitchen cupboard,
she removes a waste basket.
Lifts off its layers-- egg shells,
catfood can-lids, an empty box that
once contained migraine pills.
Sets her treasure in the bottom
As if it were a baby’s body.
Replaces the archeology to cover it.
She sits in a corner chair surrounded by dogs
to begin peeling wild apples for applesauce.
She rubs her wrist against her forehead.
Smells faintest hint of soap.
She does not cry.
Bio: Rachael Z. Ikins was born and raised in NY ‘s Fingerlakes region. She published her first poem at age 14 under the guidance of a talented English teacher. As an adult she has been published in numerous journals over the years and has won 8 poetry prizes among them first place National League of American Penwomen 2006 and 08. Her first chapbook “Slide-show in the Woods” (Foothills) was published August 08. Second chapbook “Transplanted” to be published in 2010 Finishing Line Press.
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